Halloween 2016 slowly approaches and it’s time to start thinking about costumes for guys.
Hello equinox! You are upon us. Can you believe October is here already? Didn’t summer just end? When did all these leaves start falling and WHERE is my Pumpkin Spice Latte? ((deep breath))
Yes, the fall season is filled with valuable quirks that we all look forward to, but there is one particular autumn tradition that I always anticipate — terrible Halloween costumes.
Come on, you know the type. I’m talking about the people that walk into a party wearing a costume that leaves everyone wondering, “Was it homemade?” and “Were they trying to be ironic?” Sometimes you have to wonder who comes up with these gems, but I thank them nonetheless. I’m already finding a few costumes that are going to make Halloween 2016 as terrible as the year before it, but hilarious enough to pass as an awesome costume for a fun night.
Here are a few of my favorite 2016 Halloween costume ideas for men this year.
Have you been binge watching, “Beauty is Everywhere” since they started streaming it on Netflix? Then this costume is for you. Finally, you’ll be able to adorn the luxurious head of hair and bushy beard this artistic icon was famous for. The Bob Ross Costume kit comes with wig, pallet and paintbrush, but when it comes to paint splashed jeans and baby blue button-down—you’re on your own! *Canvas Lady sold separately.
Everybody loves minions! It’s so adorable when they speak in tongues, and if you don’t feel like carrying a conversation on Halloween this costume is for you. Never mind the fact that a full sized adult minion kind of goes against the overall concept. You’ll be the life of the party! For bonus points: Find the partygoer with the most evil costume, and be their personal slave until the end of the party.
Are you looking to meet a fellow Disney fan, but you’re afraid of copyright infringement? Get your hands on this “Well Dressed” Beast costume. This 5-piece jacket comes with a delightful goat hat complete with felt horns. Sure, it’s not as luxurious as the childhood classic, but if you strap on this Deluxe Curly Lion Wig no one will even notice.
Don’t have the time or energy to put on an entire costume piece by piece? Ugh! It’s such an inconvenience! This costume is what you need. With creepiness definitely in check, this Adult Hillbilly Morphsuit will give your local trick or treaters some nightmares for years. Let’s just hope you have someone to zip you out of this thing at the end of the night—or you’ll be trapped forever!
If there were a gold medal for terrible getups, this would be the Michael Phelps of Halloween costumes. Where do I begin with this enchanting nugget? Is it the slicked back Joker wig, or the plastic purple trench coat? Perhaps it’s the plastic gold chains, or the pale tattoo covered muscle shirt. You’ve gotta hand it to the designer’s attention to detail, because the cherry on the sundae of this costume is the Joker Makeup Kit. This kit comes with two temporary tattoos…and you bet one of them is that adorable “damaged” tattoo that’s scrawled across the character’s head. I’d buy two of these kits just so you can save the other damaged tattoo for your hangover the following day. *Harley Quinn sold separately
Oh for the love of god, no! NO!
I can’t wait to see people wearing some of these costumes on my favorite holiday. Who says you always have to look great on Halloween? 2016 has been a pretty terrible year, and I think this is the perfect opportunity to embrace the terrible Halloween costume. After all, if it weren’t for these terrible costumes, the Internet wouldn’t have anything to critique.
MORE MEN’S HALLOWEEN COSTUME IDEAS
Jo Anna Van Thuyne is an actor, comedian and producer currently studying at The Upright Citizens Brigade Training Center and The Penny Templeton Studio. Sometimes you can catch her slinging jokes at an NYC open mic, or writing a snarky blog post on the internet. To find out more check out her official website or follow her on Twitter @JoPincushion.